The Alpha - Arianna Green (FULL 50 Chapter)

I didn't have nightmares. 

I woke up, warm and tranquil, in a sense. Derek's arm was wrapped around my waist, his face nuzzled in my hair, spooning me. At one point, my shirt rode up and exposed some skin which Derek's hand immediately claimed it, and now it rested there. 

I kept my eyes closed for a few seconds, wanting to stay warm despite the urge to use the restroom. 

...He was so warm... 

Out of nowhere, there was a whine, deep in my mind. My eyes flew open and I looked behind me to make sure it wasn't Derek or anything. He was still asleep. 

Could... 

...Sage?... 

There was silence for a while, but just as I went to move out of Derek's grip, the whine was evident again. 

...Sage?... 

A frail whine responded and I wanted to cry from relief! She's coming back! Was it because of Derek? I turned my head to look at him. He was so peaceful. Some locks fell on his forehead, resting. He was just so beautiful. 

'Unlike you.' 

...You don't affect me... 

They remained quiet and I turned back around, my back to his chest. I shuffled a few times, trying to get comfortable again. 

Sage was still shocked by everything that happened but I got relieved that she was shaking off that numbness. Maybe I shouldn't be here, in his arms? Was it rude of me? I tell him we should basically stick to ourselves, but I still fueled the fire by letting him nurture his bond. 

My throat constricted. 

...I'm not gonna cry, I'm not gonna cry... 

I pulled myself out of his grip, but I didn't get that far. A groggy growl sounded behind me and I was pulled back into his chest. 

"Honey..." he mumbled and repositioned himself with me. 

I froze, what was I supposed to do now? I still had to pee. I waited a few moments more before I pulled away again. 

"Honey, stop moving," he grumbled. 

I swallowed. "I g-gotta use the bathroom," I whispered. 

He grumbled and lifted his arm from my waist, freeing me. I went to the bathroom and did my business, brushed my hair, and washed my face before walking out. I looked to the bed to see if Derek was still asleep but on the contrary, he was sitting on the edge of the made bed. He made the bed? 

He looked up at me and I looked down, he sighed. I heard him get up. 

"Violet, I have to go do my Alpha duties, Garret and Hannah are coming over tonight for dinner," he told me, "you also have a therapy appointment with Socorro in an hour. I'll take you over and pick you up, so get ready," he then left. 

I stood there for a few seconds before I decided to get dressed. It was the basic things I normally wear, jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. I went downstairs to the second kitchen and ate some yogurt, sitting at the island, then Derek came down. He saw what I was eating and glared at the cup. 

"Violet, go get something to eat, I'm not doing this again," he deadpanned at me. 

The backbone in me straightened. "No, I'm n-not hungry," I rushed out. 

His eyes darkened and he walked to me. He grabbed the yogurt cup and removed it from my hands, my eyes following his movements. 

"Get something to eat," he ordered. 

I shook my head, "N-no." 

He let out a warning growl, eyes flickering from light to dark blue. He came closer to me and grabbed onto my arm, leaning down into my neck. His lips skimmed my ear and I shifted to move but he held me in place. 

"Eat something else Violet, you're not going to do this again," he spoke in my ear causing me to shiver. I felt him smirk and move down my neck, brushing my mark. 

There was a stir inside of me, not a sexual stir or a bitter feeling, but an inner shake caused by my wolf. 

...Sage?... 

The stir happened again, and then Derek pressed his lips to my mark, kissing it. I gasped out and I heard her. 

('Violet,') it came out weak but it was there. 

Derek went to move back but my hand grabbed his shirt and I made a small sound of protest. He looked down at me confused, slightly flustered, and with darkened eyes. Lustful eyes. I tugged his shirt closer to me, his eyes flickered to my mark and I whimpered. He leaned down and pressed his lips back to it and my eyes fluttered. 

I heard her whimper inside of me, calling out to me. Derek interacting with the mark was bringing her back, the bond was working. I fisted his shirt, focusing on Sage's presence as Derek worked on my neck, trailing up and down, his hands on my back and head. 

('Violet, I'm here') she voiced to me, it came to me stronger. I went to pull him closer to me but then a memory ran through me. 

..."I don't want you."... 

I immediately pushed him back from me and got off the stool I was sitting on, stepping back to create space. 

He looked even more confused at me, his eyes coming back. I moved my eyes, not able to look at him. My cheeks were burning with embarrassment, and I fumbled with my fingers. He cleared his throat and stepped back from me. 

"Violet, go get something to eat, there are eggs in the other kitchen," he instructed and I was so flushed and embarrassed that I meekly nodded and immediately left. 

What was that! Surely, there was another way to get my wolf back without... sexually touching Derek, right? Without Sage, it felt like I was missing something, 

something that I didn't know I needed, but I did. I just felt 'eh'. That's not really a feeling but it's odd. 

...Sage, are you there?... 

('Violet... I'm okay, don't worry...) it was there and I let out a breath of relief. It was weak, but it was still something. 

I walked into the kitchen and a chef immediately gave me a plate of scrambled eggs and toast. I only had a few bites, feeling full, went to put the plate away and as always a chef took it from me. 

I went out to the living room and sat down waiting for Derek as I mindlessly played with the hem on my shirt. 

It was a good sign that Sage was coming out of shock, that means things would be getting better, hopefully. My slits might start healing at a normal rate, I haven't gained any weight, perhaps I would. 

"Violet," a voice called out. I turned to see Derek waiting at the door. I blushed and got up and walked to the door. 

He held it open for me and I stepped outside immediately greeted with sunshine. I blinked, putting up a hand to get used to it. Derek started to walk and I followed behind him. We walked in silence for a few moments until Derek stopped and turned to me. 

"Honey," he paused looking at me, seeming lost, "um..." he cleared his throat, "don't walk behind me, that makes you seem weak. Equals." I couldn't make out the last thing, I was zoning out. 

"S-sorry," I mumbled, walking to his side. I went to argue that I was indeed weak, he said so himself, but he cut me off before I could utter a syllable. 

"Your eyes are beautiful," I falter while walking. My cheeks started to tingle in the familiar burning sensation and I glanced up at him before looking back down at my shoes. He chuckled at my reaction. "They are, they're a beautiful tawny-russet color and they remind me of honey." he casually like he was just talking about the weather, meanwhile I had a heat stroke happening on my face from his comment. 

...Honey?... 

"Um... th... thank you," I whispered, rushed. 

He chuckled again, "don't have to thank me." I nodded and it fell back into silence. "Violet, what happened in the kitchen this morning, was that..." he paused looking for the right words, "your bond? Your wolf? You?" he asked. 

I glanced up at him, still red from his last conversation. 

"It was S-sage, my wolf..." I informed him. 

He hummed. "I figured, Zaxton, my wolf, told me yours has been 'absent' in a way," I nodded, "the mark would definitely wake her up." 

I didn't have anything else to say, and it was quiet for the remainder of the walk to Socorro's office. Was I being too mean to Derek? He opened the door for me and I walked in. Derek walked up to the reception, informing them that I was here and soon Socorro walked out. 

"Good afternoon Alpha," he smiled and shook Derek's hand, Derek returned the expression. 

"Afternoon, I'll see you later when I pick her up, I have to go," Socorro nodded and Derek turned to me, "Violet, I'll see you soon." I nodded and he left. 

Socorro turned to me, "Nice to see you again Violeta," he smiled and led me to his office, telling me to get comfortable. 

"Um, it's Violet," I mumbled. 

He nodded, "sorry, it's from my time in Spain, I apologize," I immediately felt bad for correcting him. Next time I'll just be quiet. 

He started the session and it was going well, I was surprised that he had me open up to him, but this was his profession so he had to be good at it. We were mainly on the topic of my coma, which was hard for me to talk about. That led to talking about what happened with Mallory. 

It was a very emotional session and I was crying often. He was making it comfortable and it felt safe but it was still a touchy subject with me. 

"Now, Violet, it sounds like you kept things locked in and didn't express your troublesome feelings. Why?" 

I sniffed, composing myself, "I just..." I took a breath, "I just felt like it was a... a burden." 

"Okay, now, do you feel like this is because of what you experienced with Chris?" when he asked, it seemed he already knew the answer but wanted me to say it. 

"Yes..." I voiced, slow, and low. 

"Did you trust Mallory?" 

I thought for a second, I didn't even know what trust was anymore. "I'm not s-sure." 

He nodded. "Do you feel like if some things were expressed differently, the suicide may have not happened?" he carefully asked, studying me to make sure he didn't hit a trigger. 

"No, just post..." I sniffled, "postponed. Whether M-Mallory did that or n-not, I would've done it at s-some point." a soft sob left my lips and my shoulders shook. 

Socorro handed me a tissue. 

He nodded and coaxed me back to stability, asking softer questions. 

"Violet, do you have any hobbies? I would advise investing time in them, to keep yourself busy. It seems with your time alone, you're often being led by the negative voices and thoughts to do harmful things," he nodded with me. 

"Okay," I whispered, wiping my nose as he wrote on his clipboard. 

"Furthermore I recommend writing in a diary. You write how your day went, what you're feeling, what happens in your head. It would be extremely helpful for you," he told me. 

I nodded, "You'll tell Derek a-about this, right?" I asked. 

He looked at me completely baffled but soon masked it so I wouldn't feel dumb. 

"No, Violet, supernatural or not, it's still illegal and morally wrong to share this with others, this is all confidential. Remember I told you our first session," I didn't remember, he picked up on that, "it's okay, but no. I won't tell Alpha." 

I nodded and we ended our session, he gave me a journal and he called Derek so he knew. I sat in the lobby, wiping my nose with the tissue and my eyes with my sleeve. Just as I got up to throw the tissue away, Derek walked in. He quickly scanned me and when he saw my face a scowl formed on his face. 

"Are you okay, Flower?" he asked, stepping closer, only for me to step away from him. I nodded instead of verbally answering. I heard him sigh. "Alright, come on," he 

started walking and held the door open for me. 

"Thank you," I shakingly whispered, stepping outside. 

"You don't have to thank me, honey," he started walking and I naturally trailed behind him. 

I felt emotionally drained but refreshed? Is that what therapy is supposed to do? I was walking a little slower, still processing everything and Derek picked up on that. He walked at my pace. I felt bad so I would try and pick up my pace but fall back into my somber stroll each time. 

"Honey, you don't have to rush," Derek lightly said, slowly down to my pace and I felt bad. 

The rest of the walk was silent and we got back to the house. Once I got inside I went to walk upstairs but Derek stopped me. 

"Violet, go eat some lunch," I walked back down the two stairs and turned in the direction of the second kitchen, "you can make something or tell one of the cooks too. I have to go do some paperwork, Garret and Hannah will be over at six to have dinner." 

I nodded and we parted ways.